let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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