Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
