Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
