Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
