i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
