I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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