What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
