whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
