she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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