He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
nutella sex= disaster
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
