But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
