just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
