we're blogging at a bar
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
