sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize