return my video game
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
