try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
