I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
