she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize