I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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