just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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