I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize