ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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