Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
