K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
