do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
