oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
