i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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