living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Randomize
