LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
