any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
