How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize
