just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
