i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
