i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
