I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
