K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
