; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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