If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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