the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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