at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
