Apparently you make a good broom.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
