I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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