she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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