i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize