question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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