i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
so much tequila, so little girl.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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