Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
