i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
