at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
