In the future we'll all be gay
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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